If I love you, what business is that of yours?
  [Ger., Wenn ich dich lieb habe, was geht’s dich an?]
      – Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
        Wilhelm Meister (IV, 9) 


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Asking perfection in this quite imperfect world


Spontaneity never associates with me, when things do not go according to my plan, I flip, panic, change from a tame lady into an irascible beast. I LOVE planning, organising and absolutely loathe uncertainty. However, accidents do happen. In fact, they transpire all the time. Having said so, does it mean I must spend most of my time muttering on the inevitability of accidents?

I went to Morocco last Dec, everything was as smooth as it was planned, until the last day. The time of my flight back to London was at 12:00 noon 23rd Dec. I was STILL on a train from Fez to Marrakech at 11:10am. Yes, I was freaking out, extremely anxious. Once the train arrived at the destination, I ran as fast as possible to get in a taxi. It was 11:25am when I arrived at the airport. I ran to the counter of Easyjet, it was closed, no one was there,not even the light was on. My heart was filled with dread and the darkness echoed . When I was on the verge of breaking down  (It was Xmas, you don’t want to spend a night, perhaps more, in the airport of a foreign country) , a man from the next counter ( other airline) said to me: give me your passport . After 5 mins, he completed the check-in procedure and said: Quick! I can not remember how many times of ‘thank you’ I had said to him. After all, angels do exist in our planet. Likewise, I experienced the hospitality and considerateness of Moroccan people in going through the customs and safety check. I thank god for giving me the luck! I made to the plane on time! So when i thought the ordeal was finally over. I got stuck inside the aircraft for nearly 40 mins in Gatwick due to the severity of weather in London. Worse still, my train to Newcastle was due in 2 hour from King Cross. ‘So I can’t catch a break!’My mind kept thinking, the lock of my luggage was broken as well. With all the things happened, my optimism finally gave in, the frustration soon permeated down to my body, and my friend. At this stage, even the slightest thing can irritate me. Yes, the transformation had completed. I can imagine what my face looked like. ugly and mean. As a perfectionist, the trip was ruined because of the things happened that day. I let my negativity took over my brain and body.

How silly was that? I could have enjoyed the whole trip by changing the perspective. ‘ Wah, remember the trip we went to Morocco, the last day was such a thrill!’ Instead of getting angry on something beyond my control, why wouldn’t I simply change my mindset and  look it at a different angle? After all, bad things happen ALL THE TIME, it does not mean you HAVE to be unhappy about it. It is all about your attitude!really. A life-long lesson for a perfectionist.

Cannot bring myself into the thought of..
People’ve been rambling on and on about their new year resolutions
Surely I do have a few, but how many are they real?
Not that I am not motivated to compile a list of ‘something’,
But let’s face it, keeping up the momentum is the overarching resolution above all the actual ‘goals’ in the list.

Time to purify my ears with Jazz
Here we go..the ‘Journey to Melody’ by Stanley Turrentine



我知道 半夜的星星會唱歌
想家的夜晚 它就這樣和我一唱一和
我知道 午後的清風會唱歌
童年的蟬聲 它總是跟風一唱一和

當手中握住繁華 心情卻變得荒蕪
才發現世上 一切都會變卦
當青春剩下日記 烏絲就要變成白髮
不變的只有那首歌 在心中來回的唱

天上的星星不說話 地上的娃娃想媽媽
天上的眼睛眨呀眨 媽媽的心呀魯冰花
家鄉的茶園開滿花 媽媽的心肝在天涯
夜夜想起媽媽的話 閃閃的淚光魯冰花
啊~ 啊~ 夜夜想起媽媽的話 閃閃的淚光
啊~ 閃閃的淚光魯冰花

天上的星星不說話 地上的娃娃想媽媽
天上的眼睛眨呀眨 媽媽的心呀魯冰花
家鄉的茶園開滿花 媽媽的心肝在天涯
夜夜想起媽媽的話 閃閃的淚光魯冰花
啊~ 啊~ 夜夜想起媽媽的話 閃閃的淚光魯冰花


taa, cheryl, florence

hahahahhaha my first time hopefully will be the last time